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October 08, 2012


The LG is so insanely curious lately.  He has questions about everything from anatomy to geography and then we end up discussing how many former presidents are still alive and isn't it funny there was a president named Garfield?  He will decide he is from Africa, then ask where it is and a new geography lesson begins.

Two nights ago, he surprised me with the deepest question of them all.  We've been talking a lot about death lately.  Well, not me, he has been.  He is fascinated with the topic, I think because we discuss Grandma Kirk (my mother so much) and quite obviously, she died well before he was born.  He asks repeatedly how she died, what it was that hurt her and has it stuck in his mind she is buried in Chincoteague (we headed there right after we stopped at the cemetary).  He trips over the words pulmonary embolus and then I find myself explaining how blood clotting can be a very good thing ...or a very bad thing, depending on where it happens.  On the skin...a good thing...inside a leg or lung?  Not so much...

If you are curious, it does not upset me.  It would upset me more if he was afraid to ask me or if he thought it would worry me.  Instead he questions me without fear, and that is something I know my mother would love.  She was always very open and honest with me, and it was always so comforting to know I could ask anything without fear of reprisal.

Oh, but the deep question:  he wanted to know if anything ever happened to him, would I get another little boy to replace him?

I squeezed him tight, told him no (because how could I?) and wondered where this could have possibly come from.  Then I realized it didn't matter...because he is so curious now and even though the topic was not especially cheerful, I felt so glad that he felt he could ask me.  He was not afraid or upset, merely curious.

I only wish Peter was here for some of it.  We tend to have these conversations at night, snuggling after we read stories.  You can't duplicate that quiet tenderness during a Skype conversation, especially while you are also trying to get the dog to dance or the cat to sit (even more amusing) for someone who is watching 7,000 miles away. 

Hopefully, he has a few questions saved up for Peter...because he is just growing up so quickly.



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Oh, sweet boy. No replacing that one, for sure.

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